Magic In Your Mind

“I am a failure”

It’s something many of us have said to ourselves in moments of despair and self-pity. Especially when things are going badly, we can feel like we have not succeeded in our lives. It can destroy our confidence.

The thing to remember is that the words we choose to express our emotions can be very powerful. You might be feeling bad about something, but saying to yourself “I am a failure” is only going to make things worse. Sure, there is a part of you that gets comfort out of making yourself feel worse, but part of making progress in your self-development is making better choices. Training yourself to make better choices when you are feeling down is part of learning how to gain confidence.

The problem with “I am a failure” is that it makes you generalize. It is usually one thing in one area of your life that goes wrong and puts you in a negative mood. That negative mood makes you look around at other areas of your life and try and spot the things that are going wrong. As they say, if you look for it, you will find it. So you will invariably find things that are “wrong” about other areas in your life.

Once the momentum is there, you can look at any area of your life and find something wrong with it. By the process of generalizing, you take one thing that has gone wrong and turn it into a whole life worth of poor results. You can even take it a step further and not just focus on everything that is going wrong now, but cast a negative eye over your history. And it is a short step towards declaring that you have never achieved anything in life. And of course if you fall into the trap of thinking that you have been a lifelong underachiever, then it’s not hard to think “I am a failure”.

But where did this all begin? It began, probably with a poor performance in one task. That’s how it usually begins. You fail one test. You strike out with one girl. You miss out on a job interview. But by letting yourself get carried away with your thoughts, you turn one bad situation into “I am a failure”.

If you can catch yourself at the beginning of this little ride, it’s a great thing. Another great thing to remember is to ask yourself 2 questions. Is thinking like this making me feel good? And is thinking like this going to help me achieve my goals. The answer is a resounding no on both counts.

Generalizing from one task to your entire life is common but it doesn’t have to be. Be vigilant. Catch yourself doing it. Remind yourself that the poor performance only relates to that one area and that any spill over of emotions to other areas of life is because you are generalizing. If you can do this, you will find it is much easier to maintain confidence in even the most difficult situations.

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A goal setting worksheet can really help you set better goals. Yet with so many different worksheet versions out there, figuring out which one to use — and how to use it — can be quite a challenge. As it turns out, not every worksheet is right for every person.

So how do you choose the right goal setting worksheet for you? First of all, it helps if you know how you plan to use them — because once you know that, you’ll also know which ones are the most suitable for you — and even how to make your own. So go ahead and read on to discover the key ways to use them.

You’ll find that those worksheets really are a great resource for every part of the goal setting process, from figuring out your core values to mapping up your goals all the way to creating the individual action steps. So here are the five key ways to use such a worksheet as you go through the goal setting process:

1) Determine your core values

Write down your main values, and then whittle them down by crossing out the ones that are somewhat negotiable — until you’re left with your top five or so values that you can’t live without. Then order those from 1 to 5.

2) Match your values up with your goals

Figure out what you want and then check if your tentative goals are in alignment with your core values. If they’re not, try another goal or find ways to make the goal fit better with your core values. Be sure to be honest here. Don’t kid yourself.

3) Make your goals seductive

Write down the things you’ll get to enjoy when you have achieved your goals. Think about them in great detail, in sensory terms, one at a time. Make each of them come alive. Taste it, smell it, and imagine what it will fell to have what you’re working towards. You can even add a checklist for creating reminder note cards that you can take with you wherever you go.

4) Cut your goals down to size

Big and bold goals may be motivating, but they can also be mighty intimidating. Don’t let that stop you. Use your goal setting worksheets to cut your big goals down to size.

What does that mean? It means that you create specific action steps for each of them. Remember that famous Chinese quote about the 1000 mile road that begins with the first step? That’s what you should aim for. Write down a first step for each of your goals. Then another one. Then another one. Write as many as you can think of — but don’t stress out if you can’t think of more than the first one or two. The third step will become obvious once you have completed step one and two.

5) Schedule your first steps

On the last goal setting worksheet you should schedule your action steps. In fact, make it a checklist where you can cross off the steps you have taken. And even though it’s not a worksheet, don’t ignore your calendar. Whatever you use, a PDA or an old-fashioned Week-at-a-Glance calendar — schedule your steps, and you’ll be on your way.

And why not use some powerful tools to make your goal setting worksheet work even better for you and help your dreams become reality. You may be amazed by what they can help you achieve! Discover some of those tools in a FREE 5-part e-course by clicking here: www.TurboSelfGrowth.com. More on goal setting.

If you learn to motivate yourself, it will serve you well in all the aspects of your life. You cannot depend on others for giving you the drive you require to accomplish great things in your life. You can learn the art of self motivation if you are not having it and you can also learn to reinforce it if it tends to weaken. Lack of self motivation is the major reasons for many people who are not being able achieve the goals and subsequently experience empty feeling.

There are ways for you to escape from suffering the same fate as others do, who have not achieved their goals which they have set for themselves.

There are five simple techniques which can help you maintain your self motivation and assist you in consistent accomplishment of the objectives set by yourself.

Never forget the reasons

You have to keep on reminding yourself the reason for which you are pursuing any particular objective or goal. This will be helpful in the case of goals, which will take longer time than the rest. It is common to lose motivation if you do not get the desired results after putting in lot of efforts. If you can think of the benefits, you will be rejuvenating your motivation, which can help you in moving closer to the accomplishment of the objectives.

Constant Inspiration

Corroborating the success of others with your efforts can strengthen your self motivation. If you can realize that others have also accomplished the similar targets successfully, you will be inspired and assured that the task can be done.

Be in touch with people having the same wave length

Being in touch with like minded people and those who support your efforts will keep you motivating. You can get some good suggestions, support and insight if you are amidst them.

Keep track of your progress

You should always assess your progress and monitor it continuously if you are going to achieve the results after long time efforts. Such monitoring of the progress will further encourage you. If you start feeling that your efforts are not taking shape, then it will shatter your motivation badly.

Try to analyze the setbacks positively

You should always expect mistakes and setbacks to occur. By doing so you will be able to easily identify them when they occur and take steps to avoid their repetition. You can learn some valuable aspects if you remain watchful. This can help you in achieving your goals in a better way. This will empower you to be still more confident and motivated.

Learning to motivate yourself will relieve you of the fear to face the unexpected obstacles that come across your way. Self motivation will make you independent in achieving your goals and ambitions. If you can use your inner means to motivate yourself or further strengthen the level of motivation, you will feel strong and energetic.

If you can adhere to the above 5 techniques, you can maintain your self motivation and move on with your goals. You will be constantly enjoying success rather than facing failures.

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If you are looking for a more hands-on method of self defense, or work in the security industry, you may be thinking about purchasing a baton. No two individuals’ self defense needs are the same, and batons make a good choice for many. However, they’re not for everyone. They do require some knowledge and skill to use them correctly. Also, it helps if you have size or strength on your side. In its most basic form, a baton is a blunt stick that is used for self defense at close range.

Stun batons are one of the most popular types of batons. These combine the blunt force of a baton with the fast power of a stun gun to quickly bring an attacker down. Stun batons have been seen as all-in-one protection. The added benefit of the stun gun is affective against any type of attacker, no matter how hard you hit him with the baton. Some also include additional features like a heavy-duty flashlight or high-pitched personal alarm that can scare away attackers before they come close enough to do any harm.

Most batons are expandable or telescoping, so they are a relatively small size until needed. This allows you to carry them in a bag or on a belt loop, in a carrying pouch or in a holster. Lightweight batons can be taken nearly everywhere with you. They come in a variety of sizes so that you can choose a model that would be comfortable for you. These batons open to their full length with just a flick of the wrist. Fully extended batons give you the ability to maintain your distance from the assailant. Many styles have rubber grips or a side handle to make the baton easier to handle and use, even in conditions such as in the rain where you might otherwise lose your grip on the baton.

To use a baton for self defense effectively, you may wish to watch a few self defense videos, if you don’t have any prior training in the use of a baton. Batons are used not only for hitting the assailant, like a stick. They can also be utilized to stabilize your fist, gain leverage on an assailant’s fingers or wrist, or apply pressure to sensitive parts of the body.

Batons are used by law enforcement officials, security guards, and other around the world. Their impressive appearance may even scare away an assailant while allowing you to keep a safe distance. They are often chosen as a way to fight attackers who are hands-on, as an alternative to punching, kicking, or other physical methods of fighting back. If you are confident in your strength and want a more hands-on method of self defense than, for example, an alarm or pepper spray, then a baton may make a sensible choice for you. If you are less sure of your strength, choose one with a stun gun feature, so that your assailant will be disabled no matter how hard you are able to fight back.

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Meditation is defined as “The act of continued or extended thought, reflection, or contemplation”. It is used by millions around the world to relax the physical body. It is also used to accelerate and amplify spiritual enlightenment and growth. Meditation gives you a way to deal with the stresses of everyday life, and will also help you both feel and look younger and more alert. There is no way to practice meditation incorrectly, but there are ways to ensure you are meditating at maximum effectiveness. In this guide, you will be given a 10 step list for effective meditation.

1) Daily practice. You don’t need to have a set schedule. This doesn’t mean you need to take several hours out of every day just to meditate. Try to fit it in your schedule. Simple breathing exercises before bed and when you wake up in the morning are a good start. In general, being constantly aware of your body will help you stay in a good state throughout the day.

2) Mindfulness. This is a good method to practice, because it doesn’t take up any time. Paying attention to your body is the focus of this. Noticing little things about your breathing or reactions to events.

3) “Follow the breath”. This is a term commonly used in meditation circles. It involves inhaling through your nose, and feeling the air going into your lungs, before feeling it leave. Beginners should count to 10 to help stay on pace. This is a main fundamental of meditation. This will become much more natural with practice.

4) Reading. Reading may help you achieve a meditative state. It will help you stimulate thoughts and will help you reflect on your own life.

5) Exercise. Some would call this physical meditation. Be sure to stay mindful of your body during and after.

Meditation isn’t all about sitting on a pillow, it is also about finding the still point of your mind while moving.

6) Feeling negative emotions is a good sign. When you’re feeling sadness, anger, or fear during meditation, it means you are revealing layers that you have previously pushed from the forefront of your mind. Don’t ignore these feelings, embrace them, try to understand them.

7) Don’t push yourself. Beginners and long timers alike, it can be frustrating to stop yourself from thinking. Don’t force it. If you’re having troubles and your thoughts are wandering, accept it and observe them.

Practice Compassion. Begin by following the breath, after you’re comfortable, think of the world. Move from loved ones to the rest of the world. Imagine the sicknesses and the pains of the world. Embrace the feelings and let them go into an unconditional love. Imagine the pains going from a black tar to a blue sky.

9) Eat Healthy. A healthy diet can make or break your mental health. It will help all aspects of your body, physically and emotionally.

10) Music and ambient noise. Having the right music or ambient noise can help with mindfulness. Sitting back and relaxing while you listen to your favorite sounds or CD and meditate might just be the trick for you.

These is just a basic guide to help you meditate to the fullest extent of your abilities. For more information on specific techniques, there are many CD’s, books, videos, and online articles that can be a great asset to your meditating.

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As with everything in life, never start or venture into anything you don’t know a lot about. You must always have a good foundation on which to build on, otherwise your whole structure will be unstable and all your efforts will have gone for naught.

Here are my top ten tips for practicing self hypnosis.

1. Try to do your self hypnosis exercises consistently at the same time each day (as much possible anyway) for 15-30 minutes per session.

2. For the first few times that you practice self hypnosis, it’s recommended to only practice when you are in a somewhat relaxed condition to start with. So you may want to take a warm bath beforehand.

3. Do not force your mind when it is feeling fatigued or sleepy after a nerve-racking day. If you are very tired, then you’ll have trouble concentrating. If you need to take some time out, then just have put your feet up and get back to doing self hypnosis another time.

4. Formulate suggestions properly. No matter how effectively you practice a bad idea, it is still a bad idea. Give yourself specific commands, and phrase your hypnotic suggestions carefully, so as to form them correctly or once again, you will only act surprised when you fail. Remember, your subconscious needs the right cues, if it’s going to change your behaviours.

5. Ensure you’re prepared. Ahead of you start your session, know what suggestions you’ll be using. Don’t try to make them up on the fly. You want your conscious mind to relax and if you have to think too much, then your session won’t be very effective.

6. Find a quiet spot to practice. It’s best to minimise distractions while you are in the process of learning self hypnosis. Remember to turn off your phone and if anyone is in the area, ask them not to disrupt you.

7. Find a position where your body will be comfortable and you will find it a lot easier to enter t he hypnotic state. If you have a recliner, that would be perfect. Then again, make certain that you’re not so comfortable that you fall asleep - that defeats the purpose. A good position is to be sitting in a chair with your spine straight and your feet firmly planted on the floor.

8. Be patient. When learning a skill such as self-hypnosis, a lack of experience coupled with impatience equals all but guaranteed failure. So take your time, when dealing with your most potent and difficult-to-reach issues.

9. Make or buy a recording that guides you into hypnosis before you begin to apply suggestions. If you’re making it yourself you can either just record an induction or you may want to record your whole session, including the positive suggestions that you’ll be working with.

10. Practice putting yourself into a relaxed state as often as possible. Even if it’s just a couple of minutes here and there throughout the day, you will be able to get into hypnosis more effortlessly when you do your self hypnosis work.

Remember, the more you practice self-hypnosis, the better you’ll get, and soon you will be able to hypnotise yourself anytime and anywhere.

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There are some very clear psychological and mental benefits to laughter. When you open your mouth and let out a genuine hoot of laughter, you instantly lighten your mood and that of everyone around you. Happiness spreads from one wide-open mouth to another like a stomach virus hungry for new breeding ground. Yet, instead of infecting one body after another with flu-like symptoms, laughter infects everyone with a sense of joy and lighter spirits.

Have you ever been in a very intense situation where everyone around you was obviously feeling uptight, nervous, or scared? Have you ever seen a situation like that be turned into an entirely different situation just by something funny that breaks the mood? If so, then you have firsthand experience of the power laughter has over our mental processes.

Besides lifting your mood instantaneously, laughter actually creates physical changes within your body that promote happiness and joy. Endorphins are released when you let out a big laugh and they deliver the same effects as prescription medications that are used to treat anxiety and depression. It can also relax the muscles in various areas of the body which leads to less tension in the body. It can even boost your immune system so you get sick less often when it is enjoyed on a continuous basis!

The following tips are designed to help you get more laughter into your day. Use them as a springboard to your own creative laughter-inspiring ideas and aim to laugh a little each and every day.

The Forced Smile

Have you ever heard that if you just make yourself smile you can’t help but feel a bit happier? It is completely true! Whenever you are feeling the tears well up in your eyes, the frustration or anger overtake your body, or the stress start to overwhelm you, look in the mirror and smile at yourself for at least a full minute. Watch yourself smile and feel the difference it makes on your mood.

If you feel the desire to laugh at yourself in the mirror, by all means, do it!

Picking on Friends

People who laugh the most on a daily basis tend to be those who are natural comedians. They pick on their friends and colleagues in a playful manner, play childish pranks on others, and find many different ways to put a smile on everyone’s face. One way to get some laughter into your own world is to play the same part. Find ways to pick on your friends in a loving manner and let their smiles of delight transfer into laughter for everyone.

The Funny News

Another way to get more laughter into your life is to seek out parodies of current news clips online or watch short, funny sitcom shows on television. You probably already read something and watch TV nearly every day, so why not make it something that brings a smile to your face and takes the stress monkey off your back?

Go online and you will find tons of websites that aim to put a smile on your face.

Jokes Aren’t Just for Kids

Finally, go to the local library and check out books of jokes. Go to the bookstore and find adult-themed joke books which reveal jokes you can use with your loved one in bed…after all, laughter does bring two people closer!?

Anita Agrawal is a freelance writer for online publications and writes for family enjoyment and child education. If you truly want to have some fun and laughter, go to this Kid-Friendly Website A top line resource on clean humor for young families with lots of things for kids to get involved with.

When we think of funny life quotes the first thing that comes to mind are the Anonymous internet web sarcasms that are hilariously true to the complex sensibilities of life. However, very few might actually consider the fact that some of the most famous life quotes are brilliantly entertaining in the modern context, and can have a variety of effects on people from different walks of life. This article takes a look at some famous quotes and what it could mean for everyone around us.

Case1: “Give me a museum and I’ll fill it”- Pablo Picasso

Picasso might have been talking about the delicate intricacies of art and sculpture but his comment of confidence is apt for a lot of people all around. To our parents, it could be an option to say “Give me a child and I’ll ruin it”, trying to be what we are by forcing their opinions on us. It could be a chance for them to fill our minds with old songs, silent movies and lots and lots of schoolwork to bring us up like a model sculpture. We might be modeled on good values but end up just being a showpiece on the mantle. Our senators might take funny life quotes a step further when they say “Give me a citizen and I’ll bill it”, an interesting way to say how our life would be flooded with legislatures and taxes. We might run out of basic amenities but what better way to be a model citizen than pay breathing tax!

Case 2: “The only way to get red of a temptation is to yield to it”- Oscar Wilde

Kids of today might find it the perfect inspiration to live life on their terms. Sleeping late, watching television, skipping schools, overdose of sugar-everything is just a strenuous effort to get rid of bad habits and be a better person. Washing off our sins was never this much fun! Infact, a large section of society can be affected by funny life quotes. Crime could be the new way of reformation for policemen and the seven deadly sins committed by mankind could actually end up being the scriptures of self enlightenment. The world might be ruined, but at least it would get ruined while having fun.

Case 3: “We didn’t lose the game, we just ran out of time.”- Vince Lombardi

This could be a moral lesson for sports all over the world. Anyone being pulverized on the field could gracefully maintain their dignity by claiming that the lack of infinite time led them to win a seemingly impossible game. Dalai Lama could explain his failed political visits to Tibet by claiming that he did not lose faith in China, but the time of discussion was too short. Historically, Mahatma Gandhi could re-escalate our belief in Non-Cooperation Movements by proudly declaring the movement was not a failure, history did not give it enough time to lead to independence. Imagine reclaiming the glory of a proud nation!

Tongue firmly in cheek, the article attempts to explain how funny life quotes can be misinterpreted all around, so one should be inspired by the positivity of a quote and not the literal quote itself.

Anita Agrawal is a freelance writer for online publications and writes for family enjoyment and child education and is a matured woman who has gone through diverse experiences in life.. If you truly want to have some fun and laughter, go to this Kid-Friendly Website A top line resource on clean humor for young families with lots of things for kids to get involved with.

Gambling addiction is a horrible disease. Many do not call gambling addiction a disease because it sounds like a medical condition or something that is uncontrollable.

The word disease actually means “to be dis at ease” with a certain ailment or condition. Calling gambling addiction a disease just means that a person is dis at ease with gambling.

This does not mean that the gambler has no personal responsibility over his or her problem. A person with a severe gambling problem or compulsive gambling problem must take personal responsibility to stop gambling, or else every aspect of life can be ruined as he or she knows it.

Gambling problems destroy lives, and not only destroy the gamblers’ life but the loved ones that are part of the compulsive gamblers’ life as well.

Gambling addiction is a silent addiction, and this addiction can go on in a person long before any loved one, including friends and family find out about this.

You cannot smell gambling on someone (except when they were in a smoke filled casino), or you cannot see it in their eyes or their body movements.

The only way you may be able to discover that a loved one has a gambling problem is if you take a look at their bank account and see numerous ATM withdrawals on the same day from a casino or racetrack. That alone is a very strong indicator, however, that discovery is usually by the spouse or perhaps parent of the gambler.

So why does the gambling addict throw away his or her future because of a gambling addiction? How does this actually happen, and why?

•A gambling addiction is a progressive disease, and tends to get worse over time. Usually what happens is that the gambler builds a tolerance to the bet, and it requires a much higher wager over time to establish the same type of “gamblers high”. You see, a gambling addict does not really gamble to win. A gambling addict gambles to get high, and continue playing as long as possible. It is not about the win, but the means to the win. Gambling addiction is a means in itself, and not a means to an end. The gambling addict wants to stay in action as long as possible.

•Because bets tend to increase over time, and the amount of time the gambler plays in the casino, hangs at the track, or plays poker or slots online, the losses pile up very fast and easy.

•Gambling debts, payday advances failure to pay bills on time or at all start to become the norm now for the gambling addiction.

•Financial problems become intertwined with emotional problems including stress, lack of sleep, poor eating habits, anxiety, and depression.

•School and work can be missed as the deterioration continues as the disease of gambling addiction continues to run its’ course.

•Some gamblers resort to stealing and embezzling and risk going to jail because they are unable to stop gambling.

•Loss of family, loss of social life and friends all become commonplace for the gambling addict as things become worse and worse over time.

•Gambling addiction and compulsive gambling can become all consuming and can take over every area of the person’s life.

These are just a few things to consider if you or someone you know has a gambling problem. The best thing for the gambler to do is to stop gambling, and to get help immediately.

Gambling addiction truly has the highest suicide rate of all addictions, which makes it even more important to stop gambling and to get help.

Problem gambling and compulsive gambling kill and ruin lives very rapidly. It is important that you understand the seriousness of the disease of gambling.

Michelle S. Tee is a self help coach and author who specializes in gambling addiction and stop gambling She is the author of “111 Tips To Stop Your Gambling Addiction and Reclaim Your Life”.

If you are in debt and need help, you are not alone. Many people worldwide are up to debt to their eyeballs because of the crazy and frenetic spending that went on in the nineties and much of the new decade.

When you say to yourself, “I am in debt and need help!” you most likely feel very anxious because of your debt problems and would love to solve these problems immediately.

Being in debt is like having a huge albatross hanging over you. It does not feel good to be in debt, and you most likely wish that you could be debt free as soon as possible.

Unfortunately, it took a while to get into the debt that you are currently in, and it will take a while to get out of this debt. If you could magically snap your fingers and your debt would be gone immediately overnight, this would of course be the best thing.

When you are plagued by credit debt issues, debt solutions seem to be a difficult thing to find. It is most likely hard for you to stop using your credit cards, especially if you have no expenses and real emergencies come up for you.

At that point, you wind up deeper and deeper in the debt hole and it becomes a desperate, frustrating, and truly alarming situation.

You may sometimes even feel like throwing in the towel and giving up. You know, however, that this is not the answer and that finding debt solutions to your debt problems are really the answer.

So what can you do right now, that can set you on your way to getting debt help and finding a solution to your problems with debt?

1.First thing you need to do is getting all your credit cards together, student loans, car payments, and other debts and add these together. It is truly important to know exactly how much debt you are really in so that debt solutions can be found in the foreseeable future.

2.Determine what is the highest interest rate on all of your debts. You are going to want to tackle this first. Make sure that you put everything in order in a very neat and organize way.

3.Little straggler debts like $200 or $500 should also be taken care of first. These little nuisance debts should be gotten out of the way as soon as possible.

4.Put all of your credit cards away in a safety deposit box out of reach. Keep only one card for emergencies. It is worth $6 per month at your local bank to keep these credit cards out of reach.

5.Set up a monthly budget that includes your bills that you MUST pay as well as entertainment expenses. Put an affordable amount away in cash reserves for an emergency. Make as much of a payment that you can on your credit cards to slowly chip away at your debt. Prioritize entertainment costs, clothes, and other luxuries, and start cutting out some of these that are the least important. Do not totally give up on your luxuries because you will become upset, feel very deprived, and perhaps lose your resolve to get out of debt.

If your debt problems are really severe, it is important that you see a credit debt counselor that is preferably from a non-profit agency rather than one that is for profit.

Good luck in solving your debt problems and getting out of debt for good! Life is much better when you are debt free and have abundance!

Michelle S. Tee is a self help coach and author and is highly knowledgable in the area of debt problems and debt solutions?